Why?

After a cheerful awakening to this day, I find myself in a state of unrest and depression. Thoughts of the future and of course the age old question steeped in self doubt “what’s the point”. Normally I am a sunny side up kinda person but after recovering for the most part from serious health problems, I find myself having these thoughts more and more.

I have no want to end my life or even harm myself in anyway or form, probably as I know it CAN get better. The question really is, will it? My emotions shift dramatically from day to day, I like to see the good in people and the world. This can be an amazing gift and also a curse. Because I look for the good means I also understand he truly bad.

When I take the time to think about everything by myself I see things in a clearer light, I am able to reset my mind from unhealthy and bad thoughts. As a person who suffers from multiple daily panic attacks this is helpful.

I suppose all I can do is keep keeping on, and see if it really does get any better. In the greater sceme of things it feels like I could be doing much worse. So I guess it’s not that bad , not really.

Thank you for listening,it’s been good to talk to you again my friend.

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